Going through a divorce or separation is an extremely stressful time; there are so many factors to consider, the division of finances and property, your children’s well-being (plus your own) mixed with a huge range of emotions that can make it even more complex. During this time a clear head combined with clear communication is crucial and a divorce coach can help you achieve this.
What is a divorce coach?
A divorce coach is one on one relationship to provide support and guidance when you are going through a divorce or separation.
How does divorce coaching work?
As a divorce coach we begin by developing a one on one relationship with you for a period of time discussing your situation, children, concerns and wishes.
We will meet and speak face to face or over the phone if you cannot make it in person at our organised sessions. As a coach we focus on setting a new path for the future, setting goals that support this and strategies to achieve them.
Divorce coaching can also provide practical help such as:
Help Writing to Your Ex-Partner
Imagine you receive an angry email or text outlining that the children are tired, sick and unhappy after a weekend at your place. How you respond to this could be the difference between escalating to an all out name calling email exchange and eventually legal letters going back and forth. With our help we can act as a sounding board, we can help work with you to look at where this might be coming from and how to diffuse the situation for the sake of your children.
Helping To Resolve Differences
Coaching around how to resolve differences calmly and efficiently such as parenting styles, differences in discipline or rules around homework and bedtimes. We can role play with you and practice how you will broach contentious topics with your ex partner which need to be discussed to ensure you get your point across while keeping things amicable.
Providing Trusted Referrals if Needed
When divorcing, you will often need the advice of an accountant, lawyer and counsellors. If you don’t have one or any of these at the time, we are able to share with you the names of trusted advisers whom we work with and have seen successfully support and advise our clients.
Providing A Guiding Hand and Empathetic Ear
Emotions and stress can cloud your normal judgement. As a coach we help you see the situation clearly and process information rationally, leaving personal emotions aside. For example discussing a threatening legal letter from the other parent and evaluating options and how to best respond to ensure the conflict is kept separate from the children.
Help Cope with Intense Emotions Around the Breakdown of Your Marriage and the Co- parenting Journey.
For example working with you to help process any anger, guilt, regret to help ensure this is kept separately from your ability to parent well.
This is not therapy but an opportunity to look at practical solutions to assist with this challenging stage of your life.
Avoid Costly Mistakes, both Financially and Emotionally.
For example working with you to look at the true reality of going to Court, including the expected time frames spent with lawyers and in court, the actual core costs (positive or negative) both financially and emotionally on you and your children. We evaluate the situation with you and look at whether it’s worth it.
Refocus and Recreate. Life after Divorce.
The whole process can cause tremendous heartache and emotional scarring. Recovering from the damage of a difficult relationship is also part of the process. We provide a sounding board to help you let go of the difficulties that were in your marriage/partnership so you can refocus on you, your personal goals and your new future.
Act in the best interests of the children
This speaks for itself, and seems a simple concept and one which most parents hold dear. However, given the difficult and painful emotions which often accompany divorce and separation, sometimes parents need some support to maintain focus on ensuring the decisions they make are in the best interests of the children and a divorce coach can help achieve this objective.
- How much does the coaching cost?
Please contact us directly for our fees on (02) 8036 5596 or 0413 520 603
- How long will I need a coach?
There is no prescribed time frame, this all depends on your needs but after the first session and some initial background into your situation, we will be able to give you an idea of how many sessions may be helpful for you and over what period.
- How often and when can I contact you if I engage you as a coach?
We will meet and speak face to face or over the phone if you cannot make it in person at our organised sessions.If there is something you need to discuss or ask in between sessions you are very welcome to email us so we can try and answer your questions and provide ongoing support within business hours.
- What’s the difference between having a coach versus a counsellor?
There are some similarities between coaching and counselling. As a coach we focus more on setting a new path for the future and setting goals. We believe you have the answers to the questions and help you reach them rather than diagnosing or telling you what to do and how to change.
We establish a working relationship with you, we support you in partnership rather than a typical doctor/patient situation which can occur with counselling.
- What makes you an expert in divorce?
We have extensive experience as family mediators working with people going through a divorce, some have just freshly separated, others have been divorced for many years and are still facing issues that need to be resolved in mediation.
We see what works, what doesn’t and we can share this knowledge with you. We advise on how to create a parental alliance with your ex partner to help you best co-parent your children. We can also advise you about what NOT to do, we can tell you about the common mistakes people make and ensure you don’t make them either. This saves money, time and heartache through the divorce process.